does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
