I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
