I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
This baby is an asshole
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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