I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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