when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I have grass duct taped all over my body
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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