there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
