have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
