Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
