Are we in a gay sports bar?
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
even my farts smell like vagina
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
