Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I bet he comes in French.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
