dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
