Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
