Me. At least after what I've been through.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
