she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
