I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Randomize
