I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
This can only be settled by a dance off.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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