Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
