on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
