She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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