i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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