wanna go halves on a baby?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
