If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
