I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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