so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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