you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
