best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
