Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
