i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
