I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
