last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
