My room smells like vodka and shame
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
