If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
