Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
