omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
