Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
