He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
