let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
