I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
