i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
