Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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