I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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