? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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