Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
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