dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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