She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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