he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
