did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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