the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
