Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Pants 0. Shit 1.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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