He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
